Monday, December 26, 2005
4:46 AM
I never fail to discover new things everyday. Be it in my life, wherever I walk or just simply POPPINg right in my head in the most random moments. Just like my coffee theory. It just pop up before I head to a club and was enjoying a cup of coffee made by allan.
I think, I have lead myself to another sterotype situation. An ironic one. I hate people to look down on others or around them, also those that think so highly of themselves. However recently, Ive notice, when a bimbo, (those that that thinks OH so highly of herself and look down on others, with her high pitch bimbotic vocie). It turned me off so much, I actually roll my eyes back to her and with my best drama skills and known for my acting, I did the bimbo whatever action with my own defined bimbotic voice" Like Oh my God, thats so bimbotic. ee yucks, like so whatever!" Uh huh. haha. Its a funny sight. whahhaa
Those that have seen my acting skills, Im so sure you are rolling on the floor. =)
Sigh, I hate the repeat cycles of leaving home once again. Walking through the departures gates with a brave face and holding back tears.. Thats the hardest part of acting I have never seem to master it. Especially since my second sister won't be there when I leave, cause shes backpacking in Japan with her bf. Yikes.
Time flies. But my BAOOOO is backkk. Ah.
Sometimes, Ive changed so much, I do not even realise it has become my faults in life. Ive become more perfectionist, more competitive. I hate to lose. I hate the feeling of being a loser. Ive become more straightforward. But one thing don't change. That heart within and my procrastination.
Many things might have poured themselves on me. Yet, somehow, I always manage to find a way out even when it gets harder to breath. But I never fail to give a time for break downs. I never know the meaning of break downs and the vulnerability of humanity till this year.
Excuses we never fail to defend ourselves and our pride.
Ah I shall stop here. It gets frustrating at times, and leads me to more deep thoughts that can'ts seem to stay away. I hate those memories of you, because it stabs me so hard. Theres always a part of you everywhere I go. And sadly you were a scumbag and a fucking dickhead. Ironic bit was, your girl seems to linger on the streets too. Its tough.
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